Mother’s Day has always made me a bit sad. As a child, having no car, no ability to drive, no job and therefore no money, Meg and I relied on my dad to get the job done. But my dad isn’t very good at stuff like that so we often wouldn’t have anything to give our mom. We’d try and cook or make her things but we never felt these gifts were adequate for the amount of work, time, effort and love she put into being a mother.
After my first round of miscarriages, I began to all-out dread the holiday. I was finally able to honor my mom appropriately, but now it became a day from which I was excluded. I desperately wanted to be included in the celebration but despite Scott and my best attempts, four Mother’s Days came and went without an invitation.
I am now finally a mother. I could not love being a mother more. Nicholas is the light of my life. But I am still not looking forward to Mother’s Day. What is it then? I think it is because I know that there are other women out there that feel the way I felt. Even though I now have the title of Mother, many other “mothers†do not. I have never liked exclusion – being part of it or witnessing it. Therefore, in an attempt to enjoy this day and get over my bitterness, I would like to recognize all of those women who are mothers in one way or another yet may feel excluded from this day: birth mothers, foster mothers, step mothers, mothers-in-waiting, women childless not by choice, etc. You are all mothers in your own right and deserve to be celebrated as well.
Our birth mother is a phenomenal woman. Despite her young age, she demonstrated a bravery, selflessness and wisdom that many will never even come close to exhibiting. Out of love alone for her child, she chose to keep her baby, carry him to term, give birth to him and then place him in our home and allow Scott and I to raise him. I can not think of a more motherly act.
Mary is beautiful, intelligent, and kind. She is passionate about the environment and in the sweetest and most unassuming way really gets you to change your behaviors accordingly. Although I am not yet a vegetarian, I am constantly saying to myself “Reduce, Reuse, Recycle†in that order. She has made me a better person.
Today, Mary, I would like to honor you. I thank you for finally inviting me to be a part of the Mother’s Day club at the sacrifice of your own full participation in it. But you are a mother too, you are Niko’s birth mother, and we all love you.
Thank you for your unbelievable gift and happy Mother’s Day. And a happy Mother’s Day to ALL of you other mothers out there as well.
